This picture reflects exactly what I'm feeling at the moment.
Looking back at 2015 that's just a week ago, Wow.
Truly a year that played a pivotal role towards my life's plan. Experiences that can't be bought, and questions of the future that are still a somewhat mystery.
In a gist, here's 2015 - as the full story may take 10's of thousands of words and emotions to convey *best to catch me for a cuppa if ya can!
1. Helping my countrymen, Kelantan
2. Disappointed by PPUM
3. The American dream
4. Disappointed by KKM
5. A new adventure in Malaysia, Kuching
6. Medical to Dermatology
7. Youtube stardom still a distant future
8. 2016 - still with big dreams but nothing concrete as usual
Well, the thing that bugs me most is to see people advance in life while I "lag behind". The pathway I chose is a really long journey, and I still can't help but think about the WHAT IFS.
Every year I would make certain resolutions. Needless to say some are met and some may never see light. This year I didn't make any yet. I guess I'm still finding my way in this State of Mind.
Man, that title - like the picture above just sends jitters down people's spines.
I don't know why but whenever I start a video or post, I tend to always reiterate the fact that I am a doctor. e.g.
"As you all know, I am a doctor"
I must apologize as I tend to have short-term memory unlike my readers/ people who watch my videos. #IMHO (In my honest opinion) there must be a God because me becoming a doctor with the little effort I put in compared to my colleagues - is a miracle. Them people are hardcore nerds man. I guess that's why I write and make videos - a hobby/ place to runaway from the "responsibility" bestowed upon me with the title DOCTOR.
Anyway, a week back I released a video with the title
"HOUSEMAN are COCKROACHES !!!".
Before jumping to conclusions that I am a malignant power-house medical officer who humiliates and condemn my junior doctors - houseofficers, Please do watch the video.
Surprised to say that video of mine went semi-viral amongst the doctor-circle in Malaysia (8000 plus views as i type). It is my most popular video since years back when I made violin videos or other videos that I removed from youtube in light of my professional outlook. Essentially, my video drew mixed feelings.
I spoke about what I see happening - somewhat like a daily routine: Senior doctors belittling the junior ones. If you didn't know, a medical student is proud and happy despite the "stress" up until they begin working from the bottom up. Most medical schools prepare the young padawan with knowledge to overcome illnesses. However, this knowledge sometimes only ends up lost in translation to clinical application.
If you've lost me there (geddit lost in translation? *crashcymbal), I'm talking about the stride from being a student and leaping to the heavy shoulders of a doctor. Although they're taught how to problem solve in medicinal sense - dealing with a patient for real is a whole different ballgame. The vast array of disease and atypical variants are astonishing to say the least. With that in mind, the junior doctor is not given a moment of failure.
At least in Malaysia, from the day you report to work -
YOU'RE EXPECTED TO FUNCTION!
I won't get into the details of it, but basically the learning curve is near 90 degrees steep and the student must be able to cope with physical and emotional stress daily. The issue is, like any other profession there comes a time when he or she experiences the BAD BOSS.
As I said, it's all about expectations. The houseman (or any other junior doctor) must endure brutal remarks or sometimes even physical abuse for mistakes as minute as a word written wrongly on the patient notes. You may think I'm exaggerating, but I assure you I am not. This kind of attitude from the senior doctors is what I was trying to address.
If we don't teach the younger generation what is wrong from right, they will grow up and be 'wrong' like their predecessors
I must clarify that I did not mention by any means that it is wrong for the superior to "teach" the junior, but instead of socially humiliating the person in front of patients and the surrounding on-lookers - to approach mistakes or inadequacies in a more appropriate manner. I won't continue further but let the video speak for itself.
HOUSEMAN are COCKROACHES !!!
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Finally, for the ones who thumbbed up my vids as I was standing up for the so called "victimised", as I said at the end of the video - people will not ill treat you by any standards unless you are not up to the minimum expectation. So like I always do for myself, I urge everyone to evaluate themselves regularly to better ourselves and to improve patient safety.
